Falling in Love:
That was our topic of discussion in class this week. But mainly our whole class period I tuned most of it out. We all ready gets you need to date date date everywhere else. but there where a few things that I did find very interesting.
First off the mis attribution of arousal:
I had heard about this before. In a study a women asked men questions on a very high and shaky bridge and then the same women asked them the same questions on a low sturdy and very safe bridge. The people from the first were more attracted to the women because they misinterpreted their fear of the bridge as attraction to her. So in class we talked about others studies done on this same topic. I just find it fascinating how if we don't understand our feelings we will assign them to something in our environment. And it also makes me wonder if guys try to use this to their advantage, because the last date I went on the guy drove extremely fast.
Relationship Attachment Model (RAM):
This was so cool to me because I have always been told that touch should not come first in a relationship. But it is not just a parents wish for their child to be safe there is actually research that backs this up.
This shows that there are five areas in building a relationship.
Know Trust Rely Commit Touch
and each of these changes as the relationship does but healthy development goes from left to right. The thing that I found cool is that there is a slider under each of these. So when Know increases then Trust can. and Rely can then increase as Trust does. but it has to be level with or lower than the one before.
The example that we used in to know class was a car, you have someone before you will trust them with your car. And you have to trust them more than you rely on them.
When these go out of order then it falsely pushes the others up. For example when Touch goes up prematurely then we falsely think that all the other ones have, which leads to unstable development.
Friday, May 25, 2012
Friday, May 18, 2012
One of the things that we discussed this week, and what I found
most interesting, was the differences between men and women. Even from a young
age there are differences. And not just of obvious ones.
To start off this section we watched a video about this subject. In it some ladies were saying that if women are not capable of doing the same work as a man then the standard should be lowered or technology should aide them. She was speaking of instances like the fire department where physical strength is involved. This made me mad. I feel that if we a lowering the standards then that is not equality. We should be equal but that means that we must meet the same requirements to do the job.
To start off this section we watched a video about this subject. In it some ladies were saying that if women are not capable of doing the same work as a man then the standard should be lowered or technology should aide them. She was speaking of instances like the fire department where physical strength is involved. This made me mad. I feel that if we a lowering the standards then that is not equality. We should be equal but that means that we must meet the same requirements to do the job.
Another thing that we talked about was how when men focus on
a task that is all they are focused on and they devote a lot of energy to that
one task. But women focus on many different things at once, that is one reason
they can be doing something and then say “I don’t hear the kids anymore”
So I was thinking about that and one time my aunt was telling
me that when her husband reads books his whole attention is devoted to that
book. She said that she found the only way to get his attention was to call him
one of the characters in the book. I thought that was so cool to devote that
much attention to a book, and I tried it the next time I was reading, no I can’t
do that. While the majority of my attention is on the book, I am also listening
to everything around me.
I found this very interesting to look at the qualities that
are generally associated with each sex and see how well the complement each
other and work well together. But at the same time I see qualities of both that
I have.
Saturday, May 12, 2012
Social Class:
That is one of the first things that we talked about this week in class. And to tell the truth I have never seen much of it in my life. But that is what I get coming from a small town. I never thought that I saw it but now looking back I suppose that it was there, but it was part of life, and since the differences were not extreme no one pointed them out.
The question that we asked for how this ties into family relations is...
Does social class matter in accomplishing the purposes of a family?
And some kids in my class said that it did, but I don't think so.
My logic behind that is that the values you teach your children are more important then the class you are in. And while every class has its own unique problems and stresses that does not hinder your ability to teach.
Children need to be taught to care about themselves and others, and that can be taught in any social class. Laziness is not designated to a class. Some of the hardest working people I know are from a low class, and others are from a higher class.
I feel that it comes down to the mindset, and the effort you are going to put into accomplish the purpose of a family. and effort is not assigned to a class.
Genogram:
So we have an assignment to make a genogram. Which I started on this week. And it has been so fun, I am learning about my family, There is so many things i didn't realize, even among my aunts and uncles. So it should be fun to keep working on it.
That is one of the first things that we talked about this week in class. And to tell the truth I have never seen much of it in my life. But that is what I get coming from a small town. I never thought that I saw it but now looking back I suppose that it was there, but it was part of life, and since the differences were not extreme no one pointed them out.
The question that we asked for how this ties into family relations is...
Does social class matter in accomplishing the purposes of a family?
And some kids in my class said that it did, but I don't think so.
My logic behind that is that the values you teach your children are more important then the class you are in. And while every class has its own unique problems and stresses that does not hinder your ability to teach.
Children need to be taught to care about themselves and others, and that can be taught in any social class. Laziness is not designated to a class. Some of the hardest working people I know are from a low class, and others are from a higher class.
I feel that it comes down to the mindset, and the effort you are going to put into accomplish the purpose of a family. and effort is not assigned to a class.
Genogram:
So we have an assignment to make a genogram. Which I started on this week. And it has been so fun, I am learning about my family, There is so many things i didn't realize, even among my aunts and uncles. So it should be fun to keep working on it.
Friday, May 4, 2012
This week in class we went into more depth on systems theory. Within a system there are rules, boundaries, and roles. The rules that we are talking about are not the eat all you veggies, but the unspoken rules that govern our family interactions. Coming up with these rules was difficult for me because I live with then daily and don't notice them. but here are some that I thought of after some time.
1. Football is more important than anything else on TV. Football comes before most things in my house, but it is also a rule that we don't point out that football is more important. Many times it is bed time for the younger kids, but if someone needs to check the scores or finish the game, then they can stay up later.
2. We don't talk about things that happen in the family outside of the family. I remember the first time I broke this rule I told one of my friends something, and I was so mad at their reaction. Not because it was rude or wrong in anyway but because I though they had no right to have a reaction to something that happened in my family, even though I had told them about it.
The different boundaries that are found in families are ridged, clear, and diffused. In class we compared these to fences.
Ridged: is a cinder block wall. Neighbors know where the boundary is and it keeps people out, but also isolates us in.
Clear: is a picket fence, the boundary is set but it encourages communication, and our neighbors still think we are friendly.
Diffused: are the fence post are up but no one every finished the fence. Here the idea of the boundary is there but nothing really stops us.
1. Football is more important than anything else on TV. Football comes before most things in my house, but it is also a rule that we don't point out that football is more important. Many times it is bed time for the younger kids, but if someone needs to check the scores or finish the game, then they can stay up later.
2. We don't talk about things that happen in the family outside of the family. I remember the first time I broke this rule I told one of my friends something, and I was so mad at their reaction. Not because it was rude or wrong in anyway but because I though they had no right to have a reaction to something that happened in my family, even though I had told them about it.
The different boundaries that are found in families are ridged, clear, and diffused. In class we compared these to fences.
Ridged: is a cinder block wall. Neighbors know where the boundary is and it keeps people out, but also isolates us in.
Clear: is a picket fence, the boundary is set but it encourages communication, and our neighbors still think we are friendly.
Diffused: are the fence post are up but no one every finished the fence. Here the idea of the boundary is there but nothing really stops us.
Friday, April 27, 2012
Well first blog post, And I don’t know what I want to talk
about.
We watched a video in class about how population is in decline.
This was something that I had never thought about. Before I was always taught
that the world population was growing exponential, but this video told that the
opposite was true, and that because we are in decline there are consequences we
are going to have to face. In class we discussed the different things that lead
up to this decline. Such as the book the Population Bomb which made people
think children were bad for the world. The women’s revolution, sexual revolution,
and divorce revolution, and the rise of individualism played a role in this
decrease. The thing I found most
interesting was the divorce revolution.
The divorce revolution started when California passed the no
fault divorce bill, which made it so anyone could get a divorce without proving
the wrong-doing of their partner. This lowered the number of children people
had because a time factor comes into play since it takes time to get married,
get divorced and get remarried if they choose to. The average marrying age has increased. It is now 26 for women and 28 for men for the first marriage. And even though men usually
remarry within two years after a divorce women take longer. And by the time they get remarried
their childbearing years are limited. And since divorce is more common people
hesitate to have children because if they divorce it causes difficulties for future
relationships.
Now for what I was thinking…
So agree that we should be having children and that it is good for the economy, our communities, and for a support group. And from a gospel standpoint we also need to have children, which I agree with. But I think that extremes in anything are bad. The extreme of having too many children is as bad as not having any children. I think that we need to be realistic when thinking about having children.
So agree that we should be having children and that it is good for the economy, our communities, and for a support group. And from a gospel standpoint we also need to have children, which I agree with. But I think that extremes in anything are bad. The extreme of having too many children is as bad as not having any children. I think that we need to be realistic when thinking about having children.
Well for not knowing what to say I sure wrote alot.
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