Falling in Love:
That was our topic of discussion in class this week. But mainly our whole class period I tuned most of it out. We all ready gets you need to date date date everywhere else. but there where a few things that I did find very interesting.
First off the mis attribution of arousal:
I had heard about this before. In a study a women asked men questions on a very high and shaky bridge and then the same women asked them the same questions on a low sturdy and very safe bridge. The people from the first were more attracted to the women because they misinterpreted their fear of the bridge as attraction to her. So in class we talked about others studies done on this same topic. I just find it fascinating how if we don't understand our feelings we will assign them to something in our environment. And it also makes me wonder if guys try to use this to their advantage, because the last date I went on the guy drove extremely fast.
Relationship Attachment Model (RAM):
This was so cool to me because I have always been told that touch should not come first in a relationship. But it is not just a parents wish for their child to be safe there is actually research that backs this up.
This shows that there are five areas in building a relationship.
Know Trust Rely Commit Touch
and each of these changes as the relationship does but healthy development goes from left to right. The thing that I found cool is that there is a slider under each of these. So when Know increases then Trust can. and Rely can then increase as Trust does. but it has to be level with or lower than the one before.
The example that we used in to know class was a car, you have someone before you will trust them with your car. And you have to trust them more than you rely on them.
When these go out of order then it falsely pushes the others up. For example when Touch goes up prematurely then we falsely think that all the other ones have, which leads to unstable development.
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